House on Haunted Hill

My sister, Ali, is out stumping the vote in dreary, cold San Francisco, while I am sitting on my big arse watching the tube. There's all kind of good offerings tonite. It's Halloween! There's Scream, Scream 2, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Scary Movie, and the one I'm watching, "House on Haunted Hill."

House stars the delightful Vincent Price who hailed from St. Louis. And it has a star-studded cast? There's Richard Long, late of the Big Valley. And whatever happened to Barbara Stanwyck, eh? The plot centers on a group of folks who must stay the nite in the house for a cool $50,000. They have just met their benefactor [ Mr. Price ] and he is showing them a vat filled with acid.

The flick, shot in black and white, was directed by William Castle, sort of the Wes Craven of the 60's. Another of his forays, "Homicidal," scared the bejeezus out of me as a kid. And another, "The Night Walker," where Barbara Stanwyck ( now that name sounds familiar ) was terrorized by her husband into believing she was sleep walking. Robert Taylor, who played the hubby, wanted to drive his wife crazy or something like that.

And then there's the "7th Voyage of Sinbad," one of me all time favourites and listed on my profiles chart. You can always tell the more smug, er, serious bloggers who fail to fill out their favorite movies, books, hobbies, etc. Unless the book is on the order of "Combining Brain Surgery and Nuclear Physics" by Albert Van Doren or "The Medium IS the Message" by Alexander Putninsky-Van Clydesdale. Books the ordinary layman has never heard of.

"From the land beyond beyond.
From the land past hope and fear.
I bid you, genie, now appear."

To engage the genie, the holder of the magic lamp had to say the three phrases to summon him. Of course, the genie could only use his powers for good. The movie's special effects were created by Ray Harryhausen. Included were one-eyed cyclops, a fire-breathing dragon, giant birds, and skeleton warriors. Ray also did the sp. effects for "20 Million Miles To Earth" and "Clash of the Titans," which starred Harry Hamlin, late of L.A. Law.

Other movies frightened me as a kid. The Leech Woman, The Alligator People, and one of the scariest: "Strait Jacket" with Joan Crawford ( before she became the CEO of Pepsi ( please see "Mommie Dearest" )) and Diane Baker. On Joan's return home from a stay in the looney bin, the townsfolk in her sleepy hamlet begin losing their heads, allah her character who beheads her cheating husband at the first of the film.

Well, the House on Haunted Hill just concluded. Vincent Price got his come-uppance. And his scheming wife....ditto. They were in cahoots. ( pun unintended ) Next is "The Haunting." Damn, that also scared the bejeezus out of me back in the day. Not the computer-animated remake of a few years ago. The latter [ computer-animated ] hold no candle to the classics from yesteryear. The new ones: sKerry, smerry. Which brings us back to Ali, my ultra left-wing sister.

She is waiting with baited breath as to the outcome of Tuesday's election. I feel for her safety if her man doesn't win. Myself? I'll be content to watch another macabre journey to the center of the mind, the mind, the mind.... ( apologies to the Amboy Dukes featuring Ted Nugent )

Farewell and adieu, v.c.

P.S. Because the Packers beat the Redskins ( not Morisson's potatoes ) we'll have 6 more weeks of winter, er, legal ramifications out the kazoo. And disenfranchised voters, and.....