Sleepy On The Nite Train Revisited

Last year during the summer, my employer was doomed to filing bankruptcy. The old girl had "bit off more than she could chew." The PIC Message Bored, er, Board was engaged. And we ain't seen a flurry of posting since. People were pissed, and Ronnie Laborde, ceo at the time, was feeling the brunt of the responses. Inept and corrupt were the words being bandied about. The old girl's demise was imminent.

Yours truly, v.c., your irreverent host, joined the fray along with others. It was a fun time, yet a sad time, in that stores were closing, folks were losing their jobs, and to those that remained, our futures were uncertain. But here is a post penned in late June 03, representative of the assault on our ex-fearless leader. Because the v.p. debate from last nite and dealing with rowdy passive-aggressive guests today has left me worn plumb-out, here is an oldie-but-goodie from yesteryear, and one of me personal favourites. Submitted for your approval and perusal:

"Sleepy On The Nite Train"

Me and cajunballsauvin were tooling down the road listening to the guns n roses c.d. and heading for our monthly managers' meeting and our visit with Briggs. We were reminiscing and telling war stories, recalling our days working together with Sandy Fajitas, ( imho )
as the music blared.

Loaded like a freight train. Flyin' like an aeroplane,
Feelin' like a space brain One more time tonight
Well I'm a west coast struttin',one bad mother
Got a rattlesnake suitcase under my arm
Said I'm a mean machine been drinkin'gasoline
An honey you can make my motor hum
I got one chance left in a nine live cat....

We pulled into the parking lot of the motel and made the trek to our room. We decided to drop by the bar and soak up the ambiance and talk to our peers. Some of whom had soaked up more than the ambiance. One, Mr. Garrison, was in the midst of a story. Seems Briggs had been to his store TE < Tatooine Ewe > earlier in the week. < side note: Little does Garrison or the others know that the GALACTIC EMPIRE has secretly begun construction on a new action plan even more powerful than the first dreaded Death Star. When completed, this ultimate weapon will spell certain doom for the small band of Rebels struggling to restore freedom to the galaxy...> We caught the tail end of Garrison's yarn where Briggs arrives at TE.

Garrison
Lord Briggs, this is an unexpected pleasure.
We're honored by your presence.

Briggs
You may dispense with the pleasantries, Commander. I'm here to put you back on schedule.

Garrison turns ashen and begins to shake.

Garrison
I assure you, Lord Briggs, my men are working as fast as they can.

Briggs
Perhaps I can find new ways to
motivate them.

Garrison
I tell you, this station will become more operational as planned.

Briggs
The Emperor does not share your
optimistic appraisal of the situation.

Garrison
But he asks the impossible. I need more men.

Briggs
Then perhaps you can tell him when he arrives.

Garrison (aghast)
The Emperor's coming here?

Briggs
That is correct, Commander. And he is most displeased with your apparent lack of progress.

Garrison
We shall double our efforts.

Briggs
I hope so, Commander, for your sake. The Emperor is not as forgiving as I am.

Mr. Garrison was a bit shaken after recounting his tale. He withdrew a prescription bottle of pills from his pocket and downed a few. "Daddy's little helpers, eh? What a drag it is getting old," I thought.

After a few more brandys me and cajunballsauvin retired to our room. Garrison and the rest retreated as well. Our meeting was early in the a.m. and we needed our shut-eye.

The next morning arrived, and it was time for the meeting with our fearless leader, Lord Briggs. He called the meeting to order.

"All right, good to see everyone. Let's get started. Hey! You two dinosaurs in the back! If you don't mind, the meeting has come to order."

We all looked to the back of the room and saw no one.

"Lord Briggs, there's nobody there," someone said.

"Yeah, back in the back. The guy that can't compartmentalize and the guy that used to be in the club business in Sacramento," returned Lord Briggs.

"You fired them last week, Lord Briggs. Don't you remember?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah I did. Let's get down to brass tacks, guys and gals. We've got a lot to cover. We've got some new tactics and action plans to devour, and we've got a special guest."

"The Emperor?" we all said in unison.

"No, Harry Reemem. And without further adieu, here's Harry!" ( imho )