Your irreverent host wrote this foray back in 2002. Our company was in its "moving forward" mode, and a lot of us charges were a bit uncomfortable with our new direction. And the newly arranged Brass was restructuring our pay scale, so everyone was a bit nervous. What followed from the fish was my post entitled "Achy Brachy Heart." My old post is included here because in the dark pre-historic days of 2002, I couldn't add a song to me post and now it's possible so....
Achy Brachy Heart
by: vietnamcatfish (39/M/golden pond) 01/11/02 12:42 am
Msg: 3324 of 7452
"Don't Break My Heart, my achy brachy heart.
I just don't think it'd understand.
Cos if you break my heart, my achy brachy heart.
It might blow up and kill this man. Woo."
"O.k., Catfish, this time with feeling," came the voice from the producer, Phil Spectre. [ Special Executive For Counterintelligence Terrorism Revenge and Extortion ] Legendary hit machine maker of the 60's.
"You're just going through the motions. Get ready, fellas. Take 12."
The fellas were the Piccadilly Managers. They were recording "P.M. Sing the Hits." Volume 12 for K TEL. Catfish was singing lead on the mega-hit from the 90's.
The music fades in. Catfish is ready to sing when: "Hold it. Hold it. I can't sing this crap. Country music. Ibbq4u2 tried to reinvent my personna. Thanks, but I gotta be me."
"Settle down, Cat. What do you want to sing?" asks Spectre.
"I was saving this song for the mystery shopper, but I want to dedicate it, instead, to G.O.D. I recorded the music last week. All it needs is my voice." returns the Catfish.
"'Every Breath You Take,' the old Police song. Interesting. Let's give it a whirl." The Spectre was impressed. This could have promise.
Every breath I take
Every move I make.
Every bond I break
Every step I take
You'll be watching me.
They wrapped up the song in one take. Ibbq4u2 nodded his approval. Spectre applauded. "You're on a roll, Cat. Anymore?"
"Yeah, I'd like to do Rod Stewart's 'Reason To Believe.'"
"Can we do it in one take? K TEL wants the recording by February 1st. There's mixing, remixing, you guys know how it works," remarks Spectre.
"We can do this," say the managers in unison. "But we've got more songs to sing. We've got so much material, it's got to be a double album, er, c.d.
We want to do Springsteen's 'Dancing in the Dark.' Stevie Nicks/Tom Petty's 'Stop Dragging My Heart Around.'"
Catfish interrupts. "Don't forget ZZ Top's 'Jesus Just Left Chicago. And he's bound for Baton Rouge.'"
"That was New Orleans, Cat," corrects hootsbuddie.
"Whatever. Baton Rouge is more topical. Let's change the words. Think we'll get sued? Like George Harrison did for his 'My Sweet Lord' supposed ripoff. Of the Chiffon's 'He's So Fine.'"
Demosthenescard chimes in. He wants to add "Hurts So Good," a John Cougar Mellencamp ditty, to the playlist.
The mood was festive. The managers were relating. Spectre was impressed, not an easy accomplishment for the legendary "Wall of Sound" producer.
They finished the cuts on January 10th. The release date: February 1st. The managers were nervous. What was to become of them if Volume 12 was a flop. This was their last chance at redemption. Volume 11 had been a disappointment.
The last cuts were Michael McDonald's "I Keep Forgettin" ( We're Not In Love Anymore ), and Quarterflash's "Harden My Heart." Those two songs were the toughest but their best.
"Boys, you done good," says Phil Spectre. "Let's have a listen." He drops the needle, er, turns on the playback.
Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every bond you break
Every step you take
They'll be watching you.
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