"That Sweet Funky Stuff"

 
 
 
 

I thought about writing another bedtime story allah the old days, when the catfish would rustle up a story with a quickness. Ah, those were the days, cos now I ain't got the time. Here's how the story was to play out:

"All right, kids. Time for another story."

"Yeah, Grandpa! How come you have so many hairs in yer ears!"

"Well, your grandpa is in the embryonic stages of a condition known as old-timers disease. You can't remember a damn thing that happened 5 minutes ago, much less the day before. And when you encounter this affliction, suddenly your ears become quite hairy."

"Get on with the story, grandpa. Tell us one about your new job and your boss!"

"Kids, I just remembered. I've got another project to do for my boss. Seems I can't cram all the things he wants me to do in one day's time, so I have to bring it home with me. Can you imagine? The dickhead told me the other day that I was doing a poor job!"

"What's a dickhead, grandpa?"

Anyway, that was the jist of the story. But because I've got [ home ] work to do, the rest of the story will have to wait.

All work and no play, v.c.

P.S. Speaking of sweet funky stuff, here's a link you won't want to miss. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9pdQuV5-I4 

"The John Smoltz Admiration Club"

 
 
 
 


“I’ve come back from so much, I’ve worked so hard that I’m not going to concern myself with being the prisoner of an environment. I’ve been here 19 years, so the overwhelming feeling is, ‘They’ll never get rid of you.’ But after every single year, I’ve had to work 10 times harder just to work this out.

“All I know is, after these last two years and with my desire to work out, I’ve got two or three more years, easy. I used to always be of the mind-set that, ‘If it’s not here, it won’t be anywhere else.’ But that’s not the case any more. I’ll pitch somewhere else.”

I've always admired John Smoltz. He came to the Braves back in 87 or 88 in a trade with the De-Troit Tigers for crusty veteran Doyle Alexander. Doyle helped the Tigers win their division, but he and the team crashed and burned in the playoffs. He never was "worth a toot" afterwards. The young rookie who he was traded for. How did he do? Closing in on almost 200 wins; Cy Young Award Winner; closer extraordinaire with beaucoup saves; a starter again; 4 arm surgeries; thinks he has 3 years left; a positive influence in the clubhouse and community; the best winning percentage among post-season pitchers; and most wins in p.s. history; later.

Seems the Bravos got the better of the deal

All he's asking now is whether the Braves will pick up his contract for 2007. For a cool $8 million. A bargain in today's market. A few years ago he turned down over $3 million a year from the Yankees to stay with Atlanta.

Give the boy his contract. Fork the policy. [ wait til the season's over ] Sign the boy!

Cos it's 1, 2, 3 strikes yer out, v.c.

P.S. At the old ball game.

P.S.S. The second picture in tonite's montage is the villian in our story. He's the General Manager [ brass ] And he won't decide on John's contract for next year until the season's over. The boy has busted his ass for the team. Plus, most importantly, he's done a damn good forkin'job in 3 decades. Sign him!!!!!!!!!!! 

"Shindig" and "You Tube"

 
 
 
 

I liked "Shindig" as a young teenager. The show featured musical acts that had "it going on" at the time. Circa mid-60's.

I have been perusing Youtube.com lately, and the material is awesome. Vintage stuff.
From back in the day.

Presented for your approval are the following links to some of my favorites:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyuyRLw1bqM The Byrds-dig the go-go dancers!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ONH3hIjO3c The Ronettes-also see "Dirty Dancing!"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sDgPA2iM870 The Vanilla Fudge-this from Ed Sullivan-really big shew, eh?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etjpcF2X_mY&mode=related&search= "Ticket to Ride" by you-know-who. Not sure from whence it came-sorry.

Hullabaloo, v.c.

P.S. Modern technology. What will they think of next? 

"The Inventors of MTV" and "Can the Savvy Viewer Discern The Out-Of-Place Photo?"

 
 
 
 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJxnSHbaees Who invented MTV? Open the link, eh? 

"Faith and 'Ungawa!'"

 
 
 
 

Sometimes I can't get away from the v.c. shtick as evidenced by my reply to my niece, Amber, who(m) I affectionately refer to as Amberoonie. She sent me some pictures of her daughter Faith, which I am sharing with you.

As chronicled in posts from yesteryear, she has starred in many movies. "So I Married an Ax Murderer" which starred the dashing Mike Myers of "Shag it to me, baby," [ Austin Powers ] fame; and "Mrs. Doubtfire," with Robin Williams, Sally Field, James Bond ( Pierce Brosnan ) et al; and "Getting Even With Dad." See Ted Danson, Whoopi Goldberg, and a young, mischievous McCauley Caulkin. Ah, time flies when yer havin' fun.

So here's my response, alas, v.c. style:

Great pictures. Faith is really growing up, eh? Thanks for sending them. And I loved the ones of Simba. Although he seems disinterested in a few of them. But it looks like he enjoys the water. In the old Tarzan movies with Johnny Weismuller [ way before your time-mine, too, actually but used to watch them in the 50's and 60's on our old b/w tv screen ] his elephant's name was always Simba. "Ungawa, Simba," was what he always said. And Tarzan atop Simba would glide through the jungle while having many adventures.

"Ungawa" was junglese for communicating with the animals. It could mean anything from having Simba push a huge boulder to seal up a cave entrance to stomping on ruthless natives to riding into hostile environments. Normally, ruthless African Tribes. Another favorite line from the Tarzan series. "Guns bad-Men bad!"

Faith looks like she will be tall. And she is very happy.. Is pink still her favorite color? A girl thing, eh?

How are you doing? When are you due to download numero dose? Or is it dos?

Kitty just had a birthday and is now *%&$* years old. Who'd a thunk it?

Thanks again for the pix. Faith is adorable. Come see us soon!!!!!!!

Love you, Uncle v.c. and klan, er, clan.
P.S. Give my regards to Bone, sis, and your left-wing mother. And Simba. ( please click here, s'il vous plait )Ungawa 
P.S.S. Faitheroonie has a nice ring to it, eh?

"Heavy On The Caffeine"

 


I had my first "Red Bull" today. Applause not necessary. We are now selling it at my employment venue.

Two dynamic salesmen made a presentation filling us in with all the particulars:

1) Made in Austria [ of all places ]

2) The founder is the only billionaire in Austria.

3) It's taste is similar to a Mountain Dew.

4) The founder drinks ten a day. [ not a recommended practice per one of the wild-eyed presenters ]

5) Our cost is $1.30 per bottle and we sell it for $3.49. A profit of $2.19 per each.

6) Some dumb-asses or brilliant innovative thinkers mix it with Jagermeister or wine.

7) Its main components are sugar and caffeine.

8) Red Bull is sweeping the nation.

9) Most of us in the room [ 15-20 or so ] had never partook of a can of Red Bull nectar.

10) The majority of us had a can, and I, yours truly, did get somewhat of a rush and/or buzz. But then I've got a cold and may just be suffering hallucinations.

11) The wild-eyed, energetic salesman left with nary a smattering of applause.

Red Bull. the next frontier? v.c.

P.S. Should have saved a can for tonite, as I limped home, bruised and battered after a long ordeal at H.W. II. [ for the uninitiated "Hell Whole Two" ] Selah 

"Bill Campbell-Former Mayor of Atlanta"

 
 
 
 

Former Hizzoner Bill Campbell is going to jail. For 30 months at a minimum security prison. Why?

The Federal government followed the bribery convictions of former Atlanta mayor Bill Campbell's aides with a wide ranging indictment against Campbell himself, including

Taking payoffs from people doing business with the city;


Taking payoffs with people seeking business and licenses from the city;


Defrauding Atlanta citizens by depriving them of "good, faithful and honest services as mayor;"


Failure to disclose cash payments he received while serving as mayor.


Accepting illegal campaign contributions for his re-election as mayor.


Defrauding contributors and creditors of his re-election campaign;


Recruiting others, including city employees, to "participate in ... racketeering activity."

The poor guy got a break when the jury found him guilty of only tax evasion. And because we all know what happens when men and women go to prison, Neal Boortz asked his readers to give old Bill a nickname:

Which of these do you think should be Bill Campbell's prison name?

1) Bendover Bill
2) Brown Round
3) Mayor McPlayer
4) Brokeback Bill
5) Three Dollar Bill
6) Mayor Pill O' Biter
7) Bum Rap
8) Bubba's Love Sponge
9) Billy Butt Cheeks
10) Peaches
11) Butt Bongo Billy

Me and Kitty chose "Peaches" but then changed to Bubba's Love Sponge. v.c.

P.S. As of this posting Brokeback Bill was numero uno.

P.S.S. One of the pictures in the montage is not connected to the story. The savvy reader should be able to discern quickly the one that doesn't mesh. 

"'The Wicker Man' Trailer Circa 1973'" or "Can YOU, the Viewer Spot the Photo That Doesn't Belong In The Montage?"

 
 
 
 

A bizarre movie from 1973. Lots of pagan gods, sex, and MURDER! Click here for the trailer. 

"Who Is Picc True and True?"

 
 
 
 


My friend from the Yahoo [ see title of tonite's foray ] has continued to pose incognito. Me, Hoots, and Marty have no forking clue as to who this dude is. Methinks he is a family man with a few kids. Who probably listens to songs by Harry Chapin such as "Cat's In The Cradle" and "Taxi." [ "Harry, keep the [ chump ] change" ]

Submitted for your approval are scenarios the artful dodger would likely appear, somewhere across these United States and Canada.

Here are Robert Young, Jane Wyman, Elinor Donahue, Billy Gray and Lauren Chapin, v.c.

P.S. Or perhaps he's George Jefferson? 

"Or Perhaps He Is One Of These Folks" Apologies to "Folkes, the Restaurant"

 
 
 
  

"Too Good To Pass Up!"

 

Nuff said! For a closer view click here. 

"Strangers on my Flight" or "Where Have You Gone Joe Dimaggio?" or "Buddah Boom Buddah Bing"

 
 
 
 

A repeat, but, hey, it's summer. Time for repeats. Click here for a special tune!

Badda boom, badda bing, v.c.