Farewell and Adieu, Card

The following archived post was written last December after Christmas. Me and me buddy-in-crime, the enigmatic bbq man, wrote some infantile stories about our anonymous fraternity of posters on the PIC message bored, er, board. It was well-received and we, humbly, feel we captured the essence of each character.

According to reports, one of those posters has gone on to the message board in the sky. I salute him, the enigmatic demosthenescard, in tonite's foray:

Demosthenescard: A recurring icon who posts, leaves, is enticed back, and exits stage left again, the mysterious demosthenescard is certainly an enema, er, enigma.

Sorry, the flatulent card has, at times, waxed more than philosophic. Masquerading as Sister Yli, posing as Father A, or "delighting" us with his unusual posts, the card has made a name for himself along with the other bored members, too numerous to recite all the names.

We have long suspected the card of being British-his use of the word "loo" notwithstanding. Probably hails from England, Scotland, or Wales. Or the frozen tundra of Green Bay, Wisconsin.

Yes, he's a young 62. His idea of a "delightful" evening is snuggling with his cat, Snugglepuss, and sipping on his drink of choice, the dreaded elixir, prune juice, and his fav pastry, ditto, prune danish.

To keep fit, he scales mountain tops, most recently, the cavernous Virunga. Helps keeps him regular, which is important at his age. And the piece de resistance to an engaging evening, watching an old b&w extravaganza from way back in the day. Preferred viewing: a flick with Victor Mature, Gloria Swanson, William Holden, or anything by Billy Wilder. ( see "Sunset Blvd.," "Stalag 17," and "Some Like It Hot" )

Although he prefers a nice chill to his prune juice, shaken, not stirred, the Card was told never to post again, by yours truly. He was unable to help himself, when the dreaded shakeandbakeihelped emerged on the scene. Put-off with shake's Andy Kauffman impersonation, the card, along with other bored members, which included Rock Port, on loan from the LUB bored, bristled at shake's lame attempts to engage them.

Yes, the card, quite an enema, er, an enigma- sorry, line unintended- has been welcomed back to the bored with open arms, a semi-regular-there's that word, again- allah Dorothy Kilgallen, Bennet Smurf, Charles Nelson Reilly, Richard Dawson, et al.

Farewell and adieu, old friend, v.c.