"Stella Lieback"

I noticed Stella Lieback is mentioned in my most viewed top ten at the top of Golden Pond. The 7th Voyage of Sinbad is a new entry as well.

I'm wondering "who in Hades is Stella Lieback?" I had to click on it-to find out who this ignominious person was or is. Lo and behold, she is the infamous "McDonalds Coffee Lady" who was awarded millions of dollars. For injuries incurred while buying hot java.

I'm sure she is enjoying heaven's coffee now. Good to the last drop. 

P.S. The Bosox just won game 5 of the World Series. They are now up 3-2. And whatever happened to the curse of the bambino? Will it rear its ugly head in the near future?

P.S.S. The Braves, via Atlanta, whiffed again in the playoffs. Nuff said, eh?

P.S.S.S. The original post from 2005 concerning Ms. Lieback.

How to Make the Proper Burrito Gone Viral

Is there anything more frustrating than a bad burrito?

Sure, it takes some skill (very little) to make a good burrito, but it’s not freakin’ rocket science! There’s a correct way and a completely incorrect way, and this angry writer clearly had it made the wrong way.

In this hilarious rant, a writer by the name of Lucky Shirt breaks down exactly why a recent burrito he had was made completely wrong. He pretty much tears this guy a bigger assh*le than one of his own burritos could ever do.

In an article titled, “Dear Guy Who Just Made My Burrito,” he writes:

“Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:
You’re an idiot.
Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers lengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.”

Check out the rest of the hilarious rant, and pray you never receive a burrito that upsets you this much.
Top Photo Courtesy of Medium

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On a lighter note, the Braves looked like the Braves of the 2000's last night. Will the Braves win a game. Prediction: Braves win this series! 

Go Braves

It's that time of the year....again. Playoff time. Will there be success for the Bravos, or will it be more of the same? More heart wrenching defeats.

 Our opponent in this series is the Los Angeles Dodgers, Where in Chavez Ravine, it seems you take your life into your own hands while viewing and exiting the games. We're the underdogs, even tho we have home field advantage.

The Braves and Dodgers had a heated rivalry back in the early 80's. When Joltin' Joe Torre was the skipper for Hotlanta, and Tommy Lasorda managed the men in blue. But as Neil Young once penned: "time fades away," and that's what happened between the two clubs.

Instead of Dusty Baker, Ron "Penguin" Cey, Steve Garvey, Steve Howe and Steve Sux, er, Sax, vs.
"Whiskers" Glenn Hubbard, Dale Murphy, Rick Camp, and Knucksie this time it's Clayton Kershaw, Hyun-jinRyu, and Yasiel Puig vs Freddie Freeman, Brian McCann, Greg Kimbrel, and the Upton brothers. With Terry Pendleton as the Beaver, uh, the hot headed first base coach.

Who'd a thunk it?

Clayton Kershaw is not a baseball name. With that moniker he should be selling mutual funds. Hyun-jin Ryu sounds like something in the bottom of your egg drop soup, and Yasiel Puig, an animal best cooked outdoors and in the ground.

It all starts Thursday. Kershaw vs. Medlen.  I will be awaiting the series with baited breath.

Will it be more of the same, or is the World Series in our future?