"So You Like To Write? Eh????????"

You think it's easy writing these forays into the infantile? Well, let me assure you-it ain't. You have to be inspired plus you have to think of something clever to say! I ain't the most clever person in the world, in fact my elevator don't stop on every floor, so you can see why it's a tough gig.

There are plenty of subjects that are out there, just prime for the pickings. The war in Iraq is one. I just read where John Kerry recently stated that he had made a mistake in endorsing the middle east slugfest a few years back. Well ain't that big of him? What a total jerk-off! Where would we have been with that numb nut as the president?

And then Al Gore is parading his goofy ass around extolling the possibilities of global warming, and how the last days of Earth-as we know it-are just about kaput, fini.' Segue! I'm wondering if Gillette can bring back those aerosol deodorant sprays? The smell from those cannisters was akin to Nirvana. Ah, memories!

And for the sports fans out there-if any-Shaq and Dirk are heating things up in the NBA Finals. Everyone knows Shaq, but how many know of the 7 footer from Germany.

"Yah, I'm glad to be playing basketball in the United States. And I'd like to thank Mr. Al Gore for inventing the internet, and kudos to Mr Skerry who earned????? many purple hearts for bravery in the wilds of Vietnam. Yah!"

And then there's the Atlanta Braves who are experiencing one of their worst slides ( pun intended??? ) since 1990. After 15 years of winning their division, which is unprecedented in modern professional sports-it appears the bloom is off the rose.

Not sure how Brittney Spears is making out ( pun unintended ) nor do I know the perils that Jennifer Anniston may be enduring in this continuum of time and space, nor do I know if Siegfried-or was it Leroy, er, Roy-has made a full recovery from his vicious tiger attack, so we can't "go there." ( urban slang )

So this is what a writer, like myself?????, goes through when attempting to write-in my case-forays into the infantile. It ain't all it's cracked up ( another pun??????? ) to be. Back to the egg, eh?

You have just read another imbecilic foray by none other than v.c. Patent pending????