"442 Years in Prison"

I don't think he's gonna make it.

"New Jub"

"I don't have to worry cos I got a j....u....b." From a school teacher ( elementary school ) when questioned by her in-laws about what would happen to her if she and her husband get a divorce. 


Doesn't say much for the state of education, but the Democrats are always saying we need more teachers which always gets a rousing applause.Mitt is taking the opposite approach.


Anyhoo, yours truly has a new jub, er, job.. I'm trying to get my sea legs ( pun unintended due to the fact that I live on Golden Pond and have the moniker of catfish by way of Vietnam), because I ain't as spry as I once was.


Not really the reason for less GP posts. Well, perhaps one of the reasons.


More to be revealed.

Gwyneth Paltrow Defended By The-Dream After 'N---- In Paris' Tweet

By Gil Kaufman







Gwyneth Paltrow has a close relationship with Beyonce and Jay-Z, so it made sense that she's been hitting The Throne's European tours. During their recent performance in "Paris," however a tweet from Gwyneth set off a firestorm of backlash, prompting The-Dream to come forward and defend Gwyneth.You see, because she's besties with Jay and Beyoncé, Paltrow has the kind of pull that allowed her to watch alongside B from the stage while Jay and Kanye West were performing hit single "N---as In Paris." Singer/songwriter The-Dream apparently snapped and tweeted a picture of Gwyn grooving onstage, with a caption that read, "Ni**as in Paris for real @mrteriusnash (the dream) tyty, beehigh."






That comment, sent from Paltrow's account, set off a firestorm on Twitter, where fans and bloggers ripped the actress for seemingly using the n-word. The blog Bossip.com wondered if, "Gwyneth might be getting a little too comfortable around her black friends."






Paltrow hit Twitter on Sunday with a response that read, "Hold up, It's the title of the song!" That defense elicited responses ranging from, "People are such babies. It's a freaking song title," to one that read, "It's not the title of the song when you use it to refer to people you know in real life. Don't play dumb."






The-Dream, however, stepped in to defend his pal, explaining, "Fyi Sorry for the Confu I typed Ni**as in Paris for real from Gwens phone. My bad I was Fkd up please excuse it! We were lit!"






He then went on to post a series of peeved tweets in reaction to fans calling him out for his defense of Paltrow. "N---a doesn't have any power over me which is why this will be the last thing I say about it," he wrote. "A word means something when u react to it! ... Context is everything. Meaning it in the context as a Song which is how we Sold it to the world!!!!!! It is what it is ... And actually N---az was in Paris! LOL. Stop wasting God's time and do something with your life. Love not war."






Later, He once again took blame for posting the caption and promised his followers that, "Trust me. If I felt a mfkr was trying me on that tip that was that close to me I would've been arrested. Be nice." The arguments kept coming and finally this week, The-Dream summed up his feelings on the top by writing, "WE GIVE THE WORD TO MUCH POWER!"

"Robin Gibb Dead at 62"

Robin Gibb died a few days ago of cancer. Which was preventable had he had a checkup.


RIP Robin. And here's my favorite Bee Gees song:

Free pizza? Por favor! Pizza chain offers free pies with order in Spanish

If Rosetta Stone is not helping you distinguish "que" from "quien," maybe a passion for pepperoni will do the trick.

The Texas-based chain Pizza Patron, which has traditionally marketed to Hispanics, is offering a free, large pepperoni pizza to anyone who orders in Spanish between 5 and 8 p.m. on June 5.

As USA Today reported earlier this week, the campaign has drawn critics from all sides.
"Maybe they thought it was a cute thing to do, but I think it's discrimination," Marcela Gomez, president of Hispanic Marketing Group, a Latino marketing firm in Nashville, told USA Today. "As an advertising agency, I would never recommend this to my client."

Meanwhile advocates for English as the official language of the United States also took issue with the company's approach.

"It seems to punish people who can't speak Spanish, and I resent that," Peter Thomas, chairman of the Conservative Caucus, told USA Today. "In public areas, people should be speaking English, and that includes pizza parlors."

Pizza Patron regularly targets Hispanics with its promotions, and in 2007 the chain started accepting pesos, a move that also drew criticism.

Eduardo Gonzalez, an owner of Pizza Patron stores in Las Vegas, said the company was simply trying to thank its customers for supporting the chain and to have some fun. He said everyone was welcome to come in for the deal, and only a basic "una pizza, por favor" is needed. In fact, Pizza Patron is only giving away one type of pizza, a large pepperoni, so the ordering should be uncomplicated.

"It seems to punish people who can't speak Spanish, and I resent that," Peter Thomas, chairman of the Conservative Caucus, told USA Today. "In public areas, people should be speaking English, and that includes pizza parlors."

Pizza Patron regularly targets Hispanics with its promotions, and in 2007 the chain started accepting pesos, a move that also drew criticism.

Eduardo Gonzalez, an owner of Pizza Patron stores in Las Vegas, said the company was simply trying to thank its customers for supporting the chain and to have some fun. He said everyone was welcome to come in for the deal, and only a basic "una pizza, por favor" is needed. In fact, Pizza Patron is only giving away one type of pizza, a large pepperoni, so the ordering should be uncomplicated.

Gonzalez said he expected long lines at the stores June 5, and Pizza Patron stores will be handing out coupons for both discounted specialty pizzas and for free large pizzas, so people who do no have the time to wait can get their free pie at a later date. (No need to speak Spanish to get the coupon.)

Pizza Patron is headquartered in Dallas and boasts 102 locations in seven states.
There are five Pizza Patrons in Las Vegas: 2885 E. Charleston Blvd. Suite 102, 3510 Bonanza Road, 1979 N. Nellis Blvd, 2305 E. Sahara Ave, 721 N. Rancho Drive.

More information on the pizza promotion and the local stores can be found at pizzapatron.com.

Man who fathered 30 kids says he needs a break—on child support

And you thought Octomom had her hands full—a Tennessee man who has fathered 30 children is asking the courts for a break on child support.

Desmond Hatchett, 33, of Knoxville has children with 11 different women, reports WREG-TV.

The state already takes half his paycheck and divides it up, which doesn't amount to much when Hatchett is making only minimum wage. Some of the moms receive as little as $1.49 a month. The oldest child is 14 years old.

Hatchett explains how he reached such a critical mass: He had four kids in the same year. Twice.

Back in 2009 when Hatchett was in court to answer charges that many of the mothers were not receiving child support, he had 21 children. At the time, he said he was not going to father any more kids, but he ended up having nine more in the past three years.

The state cannot order Hatchett to stop making babies. He hasn't broken any laws, according to the report.

"Donna Summer-Dead at 63"

Teenage Boy Finds Finger in Arby’s Sandwich

Ryan Hart, a 14-year-old boy from Michigan, had a rude surprise when he bit into his Arby's roast beef sandwich. "I was like, 'that's got to be a finger,'" he told the Jackson Citizen Patriot. "It was just nasty." 


Reportedly, a restaurant employee cut off her finger with a meat slicer while preparing the meal. She left her station to deal with the emergency, and other employees, who were unaware of the injury, continued to complete the order. 

"Somebody loses a finger and you keep sending food out the window," said the teen's mom, Jamie Vail. "I can't believe that." She added that following the gruesome discovery, her son was "traumatized," couldn't eat or sleep, and had been prescribed medication Fox News reports....

 This is not the first time human remains have been found in a fast food meal but this case might be the most extreme. 

• A Dayton Ohio man sued Arby's in 2005 for reportedly serving him a chicken sandwich topped with a piece of human skin.
• In a famous 2005 hoax, a Las Vegas woman found a human finger in Wendy's chili but police later discovered she had cooked her husband's colleague's finger (which he had lost in a work accident) and slipped it into the bowl herself.
• An Albany-area man allegedly found a bloody bandage in the crust of his Pizza Hut pie in 2011.
• Also in 2011, Texan woman found blood on her French fries while eating at a Houston-area Crackle Barrel.

All-you-can-eat fish? Not for this customer.

A restaurant customer in Ozaukee County is protesting after he was cut off from the establishment's all-you-can-eat fish fry.

At 6 feet 6 inches and 350 pounds, Bill Wisth acknowledges he can pack away more fish than the average guy. But, Wisth wants Chuck's Place in Thiensville to live up to its all-you-can-eat advertising.

After Wisth ate a dozen pieces of fish last Friday, a waitress refused to bring more. The restaurant says it was running out of fish and patience. They sent Wisth on his way with eight more pieces. Wisth called the village police. And he came back two days later with a picket sign.

Waitress Elizabeth Roeming tells WTMJ-TV that they've tried to work with Wisth over the years, even letting him run a tab that he hasn't paid off.

Back to the Future’s’ Biff (Tom Wilson) has a post card for you

You know him as jock-bully Biff Tannen from the wildly popular '80s-era "Back to the Future" film franchise.
Actor-comedian Tom Wilson, who played Biff, is painfully aware of this fact.
Presumably tired of answering the same old questions from fans over the past 27 years, Wilson has written a fact sheet in the form of a post card enlightening us to all those pesky BttF inquiries he gets.

Here are a few gems:

• Michael J. Fox is nice. I'm not in close contact with him. Christopher Lloyd is nice. He is a very shy man. Crispin Glover is unusual, but not as unusual as he sometimes presents himself.
  
• The hoverboards didn't really fly, we were hanging by wires from a crane.
• The manure was made of peat moss, cork, dirt, and a food agent that made it sticky.
• Among many improvisations on the set, I coined the term "butthead," as well as "Make like a tree, and get out of here."

And if that's not enough, Wilson has also written a comedic song about the trails of answering the same questions for decades in a row, called, you guessed it, "Stop Asking Me the Question."

"Ultimate Jaws Quiz"

Thanks to FB, here is the ultimate Jaws Quiz. I got 16 outta 20. If my math serves me that's 80%. Not bad but because it's my favorite movie of all time, perhaps yours truly should have done better.


20 footer. 25!


P.S. Because Hollywood likes to do sequels, here's hoping they don't mess with this one.


My husband tells me you're into sharks!

Take the quiz.

Obi-Wan Kenobi arrested in a hit-and-run

The force is strong in Obiwan Kenobi, the real Obiwan Kenobi. The police force is also strong in Kenobi. A hit and run in April in California involved a man with the name of Obiwan Kenobi. Some of you might recall the name, as it was the name of the Jedi Knight who trained Luke Skywalker in the popular science fiction films ‘Star Wars.’

Kenobi, 37, was arrested by police officers this past weekend after allegedly being the cause of a 5-vehicle collision in Roseville. He then fled the scene of the accident in a Toyota. According to authorities, multiple injuries were caused by the accident. The man had his name legally changed to Kenobi in 1999 in order to win a prize. His name used to be Benjamin Cale Feit but he wanted to win a $1,000 prize from a radio station during the release of “Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace.” To win the money you had to arrive at the premier and prove your name was Obiwan Kenobi. It cost Feit only $12 to legally change his name. We should note that in the ‘Star Wars’ record books, Obi-Wan is spelled with a dash in it....

May the [ police ] force be with you! Apologies to Jimmy Kimmell. 

"Tanorexic?"

"Harold's To Keep Its Doors Open"

 

ATLANTA -- It was supposed to be the end of an era for an Atlanta institution Thursday. Harold's Barbecue on McDonough Boulevard was supposed to close. But it didn't because it was saved by its own tradition, its customers. Harold's has never been known for five star atmosphere. It has been known for its food.

 Rose Gaston has been going to Harold's for more than 25 years. "We always pick up a gallon of stew for our Christmas dinner," she said.

 Paula Reese said this: "Because the meat is so good."

 "And the cracklin' corn bread? Oh...it's amazing," said Quinterious Mitchell.

 Harold's has become a favorite of Governors, famous writers like Lewis Grizzard, comedians like Jeff Foxworthy and sports heroes like Evander Holyfield. It was founded in 1947 by Harold and Hugh Hembree and has been passed on through the family for 65 years. It was supposed to close on its anniversary. The current owner Billy Branyon said he told his employees last Monday he would have to close. "You've had people here for 40 something years," he said. "That includes kitchen help, their parents and grandparents worked here before them and it's all one big family...."

 

"Harold's Barbecue To Close Next Week"

Thanks to Facebook-still free and always will be. Or so the story goes. Where I saw this!
 

A sad bit of news as Harold's, an icon of Atlanta barbecue, is closing May 3rd. Famous for it's brunswick stew and cracklin' cornbread. the store is closing due to the economy. 

Most news stories on the tube and radio these days mentions how people are suffering. Some poor Wall Street guy said it was tough trying to manage on $350,000 a year.And Harold's was a victim ....."people are carpooling and not eating out as much. It's the economy." 

 When I was 9 years old, me and Bogus Bob, my childhood chum, bought cigars at Harolds. I'm going out on a limb here, but there must have been no age restrictions to purchase tobacco back in the hazy days of my youth. We soon graduated to buying packs of filter Viceroys. At 25 cents a pop, I'm guessing we robbed our piggy banks to pay for our adolescent pursuits. Plus, Bob's Dad, Sweet Lucy, was getting wise to his non-filter Chesterfield Kings disappearing.

 I also remember working for A Delivery Service during one summer on leave from Truck University. Harold's was just down the road, and we would usually go there for supper. They made a great flame-broiled burger with fries and cole slaw. Or maybe it was chips. Time fades away as Neil Young once penned. 

 I haven't eaten at Harold's in a long time-years-but the last time I was there, I remembered the same faces that had worked there when me and Bob,as dumb little adolescents. were buying cigarettes  I don't think we were calling them fags then, as we later used that term in high school-Rowdy High-and college. I forget when we discontinued using the terminology-perhaps our politically-correct consciousness kicked in.

 Harold's was a hole-in-the-wall Mom and Pop restaurant. No flash and pizazz. Just wooden tables and chairs and red-checkered tablecloths. It is a part of Americana that is dying. Just as with drive in movies and land line telephones. I would like to go one last time and savor the ambiance, the dying ambiance. Of a world gone away. 

So make room for Smokey Bones and the like, where the brisket surely comes in a bag and is heated up by the staff. It's lousy, and I haven't taken the time to voice my displeasure with it to the proper channels via email. 

But say it ain't so Joe. Harold's closing. I'll miss the owners and staff that have gotten older just like me and Bogus Bob. I'll miss the proprietor with his dirty meat-stained apron, and the dangling toothpick which was his trademark look. I'll just miss the place period.

It's a sad day in Mudville. But I want one more stab at the stew and hamburger. The slaw was pretty darn good if I recall. Farewell and Adieu.

"Harold's Barbecue"

 

These are comments from the peanut gallery, apologies to Buffalo Bob and Howdy Doody. These comments are from Yelp! Maybe it ain't just the economy!

I heard this place was the 'place' for barbecue in Atlanta but when I pulled up in the parking lot I thought this place looked like a dump. Once I walked in though the place was clean enough and the staff were very friendly. I ordered a standard pulled pork sandwich, which came quickly (roughly 5 minutes). I was expecting the taste to be exceptional but it was more tending towards mediocrity. Don't get me wrong it tastes good but I can find that taste in loads of other joints. All in all, this place is pretty good for a quick lunch but I think its quite a bit hyped up.

Barbecue- Excellent. Great, classic non-fussy barbecue. Great cornbread. Great Brunswick Stew. Great sweet tea.
Service- Insanely slow, and bare. I've been twice, and the first time, I waited 30 minutes for a BBQ sandwich and was the only other person in there. The second time, it was a little better, by maybe 5 minutes. I think it's met it's hayday, and I hate that. Because this place is part of not just Atlanta, but Georgia barbecue history.
And the last time I went there, it was raining, and the roof was leaking all over the place, even on the table next to us. The place is in sore sorts.

i've always figured  that the best barbecue is found in places you wouldn't visit after dark, where they have bars on the windows and just enough grease on the tables to write your initials...   if that's the definition, then Harold's ought to be World Class - but it isn't.

This famous Atlanta landmark stands in the shadow of the federal prison and has become a shadow of its former self.  All that's left is some still very good Brunswick Stew, excellent sweet tea, and nearly seven decades in one spot.

Used to be they were also known for their cracklin' cornbread - but it's turned dry and the thin slivers of fatback meant to add moisture and flavor are hard to find.

The pork is chopped behind the front counter (was that a pistol in the pocket of the guy doing the chopping?) but is devoid of any fat and the flavor smoke imbues in fat that provides pulled or chopped pork its real flavor. The ribs (baby-backs) were only a tad better.

Many members of the staff seem to have reported for work there on opening day and never left.   To be fair, they're great folks, true southerners who deserve to be able to serve  better.

You  want good Brunswick Stew, give Harold's a try, or take a road trip on I-8u5 to Rogers in Hogansville.   Ribs?  Give 'Cue in Alpharetta or DaddyZ' in Atlanta a shot. Chopped pork? Virtually any place else will be better.

As Neil Young once penned "a new design, a new design."  

Mo. woman wins $5.8M in 'Girls Gone Wild' case

ST. LOUIS (AP) — The company that makes "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs is seeking to overturn a verdict awarding nearly $6 million to a St. Louis-area woman who claims her bare breasts were recorded without permission.

St. Louis Circuit Judge John Garvey last month sided with Tamara Favazza in her suit against Mantra Films Inc. and MRA Holdings LLC, awarding her $5.77 million. She was a 20-year-old college student in 2005 when someone lifted her tank top during a party at a St. Louis bar, exposing her breasts. Another person filmed it. She later discovered the recording was part of the "Girls Gone Wild Sorority Orgy" DVD series.

Favazza claimed in the suit originally filed in 2008 that she did not give consent and the resulting DVD damaged her reputation. A St. Louis jury sided with the DVD makers in 2010, but a retrial was granted....

I like this comment from one of the readers, always the best part of these stories. From Mark ( Mark  •  7 hours ago )

Since it was ruled that she was an 'unwilling participant'... does that mean I can sue the video company for false advertising since she technically hadn't "Gone Wild?"

"Obsession or What?