I'm not the smartest guy in the world. Far from it. But I do know my presidents. I once could could recite 'em all in order, but now the Millard Fillmores, James Polks, and Rutherford Berchard Hayes have skewered my chronology. So much for me being on Jeopardy with Alex Trebeck.
Here's the link. I am also enclosing the ten questions they were asked.
Oklahoma Students Score Low on Basic Civic Questions.
What is the supreme law of the land?
What do we call the first ten amendments to the Constitution?
What are the two parts of the U.S. Congress?
How many justices are there on the Supreme Court?
Who wrote the Declaration of Independence?
What ocean is on the east coast of the United States?
What are the two major political parities in the United States?
We elect a U.S. senator for how many years?
Who was the first President of the United States?
Who is in charge of the executive branch?
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
"We're Number 37"
A tip of the cap to the Hootster for providing today's intrigue. The world is clamoring for more from my old buddy of umpteen years. When are you gonna get back into the blogging business.
I remember when we first started-thanks to you-most people didn't know a blog from a blurb in a punchbowl. Now everyone writes one. As usual, you were way ahead of your time.
You created a firestorm with your "What is B.O.'s religion?" Today you could have immersed your readers in all of the health care issues. I know you miss that!
The world is quietly awaiting your return. At leas a guy who hails from Texas via Dallas. Aka Rockhead. Go Lubys! And are they still in business? Or has the nation seen the last of the LuAnne specials?
Which reminds me. I sure wish I had me a big Chicken Fried Steak with some sawmill gravy. Ye doggies. And some cream slaw or cole slaw with cream. And while we're at it some good ole carrot shooflay.
Thanks again to the Hootster for providing some comic relief. Laughter is the best medicine. And was it Readers Digest who....
I remember when we first started-thanks to you-most people didn't know a blog from a blurb in a punchbowl. Now everyone writes one. As usual, you were way ahead of your time.
You created a firestorm with your "What is B.O.'s religion?" Today you could have immersed your readers in all of the health care issues. I know you miss that!
The world is quietly awaiting your return. At leas a guy who hails from Texas via Dallas. Aka Rockhead. Go Lubys! And are they still in business? Or has the nation seen the last of the LuAnne specials?
Which reminds me. I sure wish I had me a big Chicken Fried Steak with some sawmill gravy. Ye doggies. And some cream slaw or cole slaw with cream. And while we're at it some good ole carrot shooflay.
Thanks again to the Hootster for providing some comic relief. Laughter is the best medicine. And was it Readers Digest who....
Sunday, September 13, 2009
"Rally in San Fran"
My ultra-liberal sis, Olga, at a rally in the city by the bay. And who believes the old adage: "blondes have more fun."
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
"Health Care Reform"
Are they gonna pass this thing or what? Emotions are running high on both fronts. Name calling, race baiting, dirty politics-what else is new?
I on the other hand have had all kinds of health issues recently. To wit:
1) Pimple in my left eye. Swollen membrane and lots of mucous. ( too much info-I know ) Remedy: antibiotic lotion and antibiotics.
2) Wart on right foot. Caused by continually stooping on said foot many times in a day(s). Remedy: soak foot in solution followed by acid medication on culprit ( wart ). Ouch! Yes, it hurts like a mother.
3) Poison ivy: Fingers, arms, legs affected. Especially severe around bird finger on right hand. Wouldn't have gone to Urgent Care except my right eye was inflamed. Thought I might have another pimple but no mucous. Instead, it was poison ivy. Damn. Remedy: steroid shot in left buttocks and 5 days of steroids taken orally.
4) No comment: Daily dose of cialis. Remedy: Hot passionate love making. I know-too much info.
5) High cholesterol: Have had this for years. Runs in the family. Remedy: Crestor and a healthy diet. Yeah, right. My last check-up revealed my levels were pretty good, so there's hope for me yet.
So far no heart attacks, strokes, hemorrhoids, acid reflux, high blood pressure, prostate cancer, lumbago, piles ( another name for sufferers who must use Preparation X for relief ), fainting spells, diabetes, m.s., etc.
As the Health Care Bill battles rage on, I'm thankful that I have insurance. And I thank God for Cobra.
I on the other hand have had all kinds of health issues recently. To wit:
1) Pimple in my left eye. Swollen membrane and lots of mucous. ( too much info-I know ) Remedy: antibiotic lotion and antibiotics.
2) Wart on right foot. Caused by continually stooping on said foot many times in a day(s). Remedy: soak foot in solution followed by acid medication on culprit ( wart ). Ouch! Yes, it hurts like a mother.
3) Poison ivy: Fingers, arms, legs affected. Especially severe around bird finger on right hand. Wouldn't have gone to Urgent Care except my right eye was inflamed. Thought I might have another pimple but no mucous. Instead, it was poison ivy. Damn. Remedy: steroid shot in left buttocks and 5 days of steroids taken orally.
4) No comment: Daily dose of cialis. Remedy: Hot passionate love making. I know-too much info.
5) High cholesterol: Have had this for years. Runs in the family. Remedy: Crestor and a healthy diet. Yeah, right. My last check-up revealed my levels were pretty good, so there's hope for me yet.
So far no heart attacks, strokes, hemorrhoids, acid reflux, high blood pressure, prostate cancer, lumbago, piles ( another name for sufferers who must use Preparation X for relief ), fainting spells, diabetes, m.s., etc.
As the Health Care Bill battles rage on, I'm thankful that I have insurance. And I thank God for Cobra.
Thursday, September 03, 2009
"Orgasm For An Hour"
Continuing the "Sex in the city on Golden Pond:"
The two of us—Vera and Steve—have beens students and teachers of sensuality for a total of more than fifty years. We make sensuality and pleasure the highest priority in our lives, more important than success or anything else. This does not mean we stay in bed all the time, stimulating each other. It does mean that when we reach a fork in the road or have to make a decision, we choose the path that feels the most pleasurable and fun. We have both chosen "orgasm" as our field of specialization—specifically, orgasm in women—although we also study and teach about men's orgasms to both classes and private clients. We cannot think of a more pleasurable subject.
The two of us—Vera and Steve—have beens students and teachers of sensuality for a total of more than fifty years. We make sensuality and pleasure the highest priority in our lives, more important than success or anything else. This does not mean we stay in bed all the time, stimulating each other. It does mean that when we reach a fork in the road or have to make a decision, we choose the path that feels the most pleasurable and fun. We have both chosen "orgasm" as our field of specialization—specifically, orgasm in women—although we also study and teach about men's orgasms to both classes and private clients. We cannot think of a more pleasurable subject.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
"Paul McCartney Concert"
Yeah, it was great. Lots of music-of course-and lots of pizazz.
Yeah, it rained for about 15 minutes water-logging my left shoe and soaking my shirt and pants.
Yeah, it was good to see my boyhood idol and listen to all the old songs. Even if he didn't sing "Maybe I'm Amazed." I guess that's what happens when love turns sour. And the ex-wife wants a ton of alimony.
Yeah, the concert was great. And the crowd was interesting, especially the women who were territorial when it came to their outstretched blankets. Don't step on them, cos you know-and I know-how anal women are.
I met two young couples, one who both worked for TCM.
"My favorite channel," I told them.
The husband was an accountant and his wife a publicist. I was impressed when she told me she worked with Robert Osborne, famed host of TCM. And being Mr. Trivia, I mentioned to them how Robert got his start on the "Lucy Show," not to be confused with "I Love Lucy."
They were more impressed with yours truly, when I just happened to let it out of the bag that I had seen the Fab 4 in person in 1965.
"Hey, he's seen the Beatles," the hubby said to everyone in ear shot of his voice. Because of this distinction, I became an instant crowd celebrity.
The crowd was young, too. Which impressed me. And they knew the words to most of the songs. Which really impressed me.
"Helter Skelter," which helped inspire Charles Manson to his dastardly deeds; "Yesterday;" "Drive My Car;" "I Saw Her Standing There;" and "Hey Jude" were just a few of the songs. "H.J." has to be the best sing-along song evah.
Yeah, it was great. Kinda like being at Woodstock, circa '69. Except for no sex-none that I saw-no Jimi Hendrix or Janis Joplin, and we all paid to get in. There was plenty of beer at 7 bucks a pop, and the smell of cannabis wafted through the old mucous membranes a time or two.
A splendid time was guaranteed for all, and my main man came through as usual. Can't wait til the next one.
This is the song that opened the show!
Actual footage and I was there.
Yeah, it rained for about 15 minutes water-logging my left shoe and soaking my shirt and pants.
Yeah, it was good to see my boyhood idol and listen to all the old songs. Even if he didn't sing "Maybe I'm Amazed." I guess that's what happens when love turns sour. And the ex-wife wants a ton of alimony.
Yeah, the concert was great. And the crowd was interesting, especially the women who were territorial when it came to their outstretched blankets. Don't step on them, cos you know-and I know-how anal women are.
I met two young couples, one who both worked for TCM.
"My favorite channel," I told them.
The husband was an accountant and his wife a publicist. I was impressed when she told me she worked with Robert Osborne, famed host of TCM. And being Mr. Trivia, I mentioned to them how Robert got his start on the "Lucy Show," not to be confused with "I Love Lucy."
They were more impressed with yours truly, when I just happened to let it out of the bag that I had seen the Fab 4 in person in 1965.
"Hey, he's seen the Beatles," the hubby said to everyone in ear shot of his voice. Because of this distinction, I became an instant crowd celebrity.
The crowd was young, too. Which impressed me. And they knew the words to most of the songs. Which really impressed me.
"Helter Skelter," which helped inspire Charles Manson to his dastardly deeds; "Yesterday;" "Drive My Car;" "I Saw Her Standing There;" and "Hey Jude" were just a few of the songs. "H.J." has to be the best sing-along song evah.
Yeah, it was great. Kinda like being at Woodstock, circa '69. Except for no sex-none that I saw-no Jimi Hendrix or Janis Joplin, and we all paid to get in. There was plenty of beer at 7 bucks a pop, and the smell of cannabis wafted through the old mucous membranes a time or two.
A splendid time was guaranteed for all, and my main man came through as usual. Can't wait til the next one.
This is the song that opened the show!
Actual footage and I was there.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
"Literal Video-'Total Eclipse of the Heart'"
Saw this on "Nightline" last night. These are the newest rage on youtube ( literal videoes ). This one is hilarious.
And this one from the 60's is pretty good.
And this one from the 60's is pretty good.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
For Yasgur's Farm
Seems the 40 year celebration of Woodstock is upon us. Time flies when yer havin' fun.
A lot of shit has gone down since then.Wonder if Town Hall meetings were in vogue then? I don't recall any.
A lot of shit has gone down since then.Wonder if Town Hall meetings were in vogue then? I don't recall any.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
"Town Hall Meeting"
I was gonna write about my experience at my first town hall meeting concerning health care, but then I remembered Paul McCartney is coming to town Saturday afternoon, so that tale will have to be delayed a bit.
The concert is at Piedmont Park where they recently discovered dead fish floating on top of the water in a lake which dots the landscape. Seems the poor creatures died of asphyxiation. And the odor was unbearable according to witnesses.
"You fucking Nazi. Sit down and shut the fuck up"
Sorry! Forgot the foray into the infantile is about Paul Mac arriving in town to give a concert for charity.
"How much did they pay you to come here? Nazi!"
Saturday at 5 p.m. is when the festivities begin.
"Shut the fuck up. What do you think this is? A democracy or something?"
Sorry. Sir Paul, ex Fab 4 member, is the message here.
"Your un-American if you don't like this plan. Seig heil, you nazi bastard."
It's gonna be good. See you there. I can't wait. And from what I understand, the fish have left the building.
The concert is at Piedmont Park where they recently discovered dead fish floating on top of the water in a lake which dots the landscape. Seems the poor creatures died of asphyxiation. And the odor was unbearable according to witnesses.
"You fucking Nazi. Sit down and shut the fuck up"
Sorry! Forgot the foray into the infantile is about Paul Mac arriving in town to give a concert for charity.
"How much did they pay you to come here? Nazi!"
Saturday at 5 p.m. is when the festivities begin.
"Shut the fuck up. What do you think this is? A democracy or something?"
Sorry. Sir Paul, ex Fab 4 member, is the message here.
"Your un-American if you don't like this plan. Seig heil, you nazi bastard."
It's gonna be good. See you there. I can't wait. And from what I understand, the fish have left the building.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
"Someone Got Excited-Had to Call the State Militia"
She may be weary. Thanks to an encore presentation of "Bull Durham" on TBS tonite.
Two incredible live performances from back in the daze.
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
It's Almost Tuesday Nite
....so I could go to a movie. I could play poker ( Texas Hold 'Em ) at Y Knot's Sports Bar here on Golden Pond or I could watch an old movie on TCM-an old Joan Crawford or Clark Gable classic- or I could watch endless youtube videos on the computer....
Or I could watch the sunset-wouldn't that be thrilling?-or clean up the kitchen and make my bed or....
What should I be doing? I should be....dancing. So what am I doing on my back?
On second thought I'd rather be at the hop!
Everybody rock!
Or I could watch the sunset-wouldn't that be thrilling?-or clean up the kitchen and make my bed or....
What should I be doing? I should be....dancing. So what am I doing on my back?
On second thought I'd rather be at the hop!
Everybody rock!
Friday, August 07, 2009
It's Friday Night
....so I could go to a movie. I could play poker ( Texas Hold 'Em ) at Y Knot's Sports Bar here on Golden Pond or I could watch an old movie on TCM-an old Bette Davis or Cary Grant classic- or I could watch endless youtube videos on the computer....
Or I could watch the sunset-wouldn't that be thrilling?-or clean up the kitchen and make my bed or....
What should I be doing? I should be....dancing. So what am I doing on my back?
Or I could watch the sunset-wouldn't that be thrilling?-or clean up the kitchen and make my bed or....
What should I be doing? I should be....dancing. So what am I doing on my back?
Thursday, August 06, 2009
The new Dallas Cowboys Stadium will offer $90 pizzas
According to the Cowboys, the 20-inch pizzas at the new stadium will cost $60, not $90 as reported. (That's the same price they were in the suites at Texas Stadium.) There will be five different types of pizza available for that price. Beer will be sold for $5.
As for the $90 pizza, that's the cost for a plain pizza. No word on how much each topping costs but, suffice it to say, if you're a fan of pepperoni you may want to consider refinancing your mortgage before you head down to watch the Cowboys.
As for the $90 pizza, that's the cost for a plain pizza. No word on how much each topping costs but, suffice it to say, if you're a fan of pepperoni you may want to consider refinancing your mortgage before you head down to watch the Cowboys.
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
"More Traffic Needed" Sex Sells
I've got to figure out a way to increase traffic on Golden Pond. And sex may be the way to go. Pictures of nudes, semi-nudes, persons dabbling in oral pleasures, rear entries, semi-rear entries, pix of big breasteses, small breasts, lesbians gettin' it on, semi-lesbians gettin' it on.
So look for more sex in G.P. and titles like:
Long Dong Silver Hi-Hoe and Away
Debbie Does Philly
Behind the Screen Door
Deep Throat; Deeper Throat; Deepest Throat
Scarlett Takes a Tumble ( for real )
You Want to Put It Where
I Thought Only Jewish Girls Did That
Interracial Tongue Lashing
Uranus Bashing
Sexual Asian Rationing ( Sideways Production )
BB Booty Fashioning
Prissy Passioning
Works for me. New marketing on the way
So look for more sex in G.P. and titles like:
Long Dong Silver Hi-Hoe and Away
Debbie Does Philly
Behind the Screen Door
Deep Throat; Deeper Throat; Deepest Throat
Scarlett Takes a Tumble ( for real )
You Want to Put It Where
I Thought Only Jewish Girls Did That
Interracial Tongue Lashing
Uranus Bashing
Sexual Asian Rationing ( Sideways Production )
BB Booty Fashioning
Prissy Passioning
Works for me. New marketing on the way
Saturday, August 01, 2009
"Newest IPhone To Include A Grain of Sand From the Ark of the Covenant"
Yes, folks. Get yours today! Use the special feature to ISmite people on your contact list. There's a few in mine that I would just love to send an ISmite message.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)